Thursday, October 30, 2008
Tell me something I don't know
Okay, So maybe I was wrong. Damn, I should stop being so..insecure. Whatever. I just can't wait for tomorrow.
If only tomorrow is yesterday.
I was forgotten, yet again. I received no calls or texts since yesterday. Maybe he's too busy? But busy with what? I have no idea. *sigh* I hope the past won't repeat itself. Cuz I got bored watching it repeat again and again.
If only I'm able to read his heart. Then I might understand him better. But too bad, we, humans will never be able to read others heart. We're only able to read the body language or facial expressions.
I can't help looking at my phone to see if he calls/text. Everytime it rang, I'd sprung to get my phone, eager to see who called or text. But I'll end up being frustrated cuz it wasn't him.
I apologies for ranting so much. PMS. ):
I miss him so much.. 2 more days to his birthday.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
This is just randomness.
Sorry for the late update. Been busy lately. Well, first thing first. Training was okay. I got the job. But I have to wait for the X-Ray. Then after that, I'll be able to start job. Well, the experience was worthwhile. It was fun. Met new people. All of them were welcoming & outgoing. It was nice to have colleagues like them. The manager herself wasn't bad. I'm in love with the uniform. Haha.
Life for me have been rough lately. Nothing exciting happened actually. This is life, living in curfews and boundaries. ): How I wish I'm a guy.. Cuz being a girl, is tough. Parents usually control their daughter(if they have) more than their son. You should know why.
My highlights are fading. I need to bleach it. ):
Friday, October 24, 2008
Today, not yesterday, not tomorrow.
I hate you, I hate you, I hate you I HATE YOU I HATE YOU! Eventhough I don't really know you, I hate you! :@ Cuz, cuz of you, things didn't work out for us last year. Yes, I put all the blame to you. Who asked you to be flirtatious. Everytime I hear your name, I'd flame up with anger. Cuz I just hate you so much.
Sorry. PMS. HAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHA.
Anyway, today was tiring. Training was fine. Just theory. Nothing much. The real training would start on next Tuesday. After trainings, went to Fajar to meet bf for a few minutes. Then, went to Pending to meet cousin. Cuz I miss her and her mum and her lil sis. But too bad, her lil sis was sleeping. After meeting her, I went to Jelapang again to meet Matt. Then, went to CCK to meet Yana and her friend, Ain(I think). After that, Home. haha. So, I spent the whole day at Bt Panjang & the night at CCK.
IM HUNGRY! Cuz I only had one slice of pizza today. yes, only ONE SLICE. ): Cuz the others who went to training were all guys and I'm shy cuz I'm just an outsider. THEY DIDN'T EVEN OFFER ME. How gentleman are they. tsk.
I miss bf. I wanna go out with him. But I have no money. Because I waste money. Because I don't know how to save. Because I get attracted to things easily. Because the things keep on calling me and phsycho me, "buy me, buy me...." Because because because.................I DON'T KNOW LAH!
I miss the people whom I used to call friends. Those people whom I used to care & treasure. I hate what happened to us. But, its ok. Cuz I still have friends. :) Those who are true and sincere. Those who really cared. Those who would listen to my problems. I'm strong.
Life updates.
 Yes, I'm promoted. :D I was having butterflies in the stomach before I got the results....... And the minute I got it, I was relief. Cuz to my disbelief, I was promoted. :D But am agitated with the results. ): I see many U grades. But lucky English & Maths help me. Malay too. So, I had just enough marks for the promotion. No, I wasn't advanced. I'm gonna relax this holidays. And my resolution for next year is -STUDY HARD & STOP MISSING SCHOOL! Haha. I need to buck up real hard. Cuz Ns just next year.
Yesterday(A while ago) was the first monthsarry. :) I know there's nothing much to be happy bout but, I just feel overjoyed. :D & I'm surprised that we didn't have any major arguements this whole month. But we do have minor ones. Haha. Those that we will laugh at, when reminisced. He's the one. :)
& not to forget, Maz's birthday! Getting older! HAHAHA. I can see white hair appearing already.....KIDDING! If he sees this, I'm gonna get it for sure. But birthday boy was drenched, while otw to Fajar from lakeside. HAHA.
Tomorrow's training! I'm having butterflies in the stomach now.... Actually, there's nothing to be nervous about.. But I'm afraid if I'll mess up things and get laughed at ):
I just had my hair highlight and I wasted 85 bucks. -.-v And its not actually the colour I wanted... but its okay I guess. I had my haircut too. But not much difference. Only the bangs are shorter.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Untitled lah!
SHIT! Tomorrow, I'm gonna meet my doomsday. Cuz I'm getting my result! D: Why I worry?? Cuz I didn't put in effort for my FYEs. Damn it. ): Anyway, few more minutes to the 1st monthsarry & Mazree's birthday. I can't wait for tomorrow! No, not cuz of the results but the HOLIDAYS!!!! Finally! & I gonna get my hair done tomorrow. Still considering if I should get red highlights or light brown. D: But I've been craving for red like, last year! I need money now ): Though I do have some, but I need more than what I have in my wallet.. Cuz I wanna buy make ups, hair sprays, new shoes and clothes! I just thought I need to clear up my wardrobe for new things. I hope it rains money one day. D: Or at least someone so genorous, willing to give me. Haha! I can't wait to start work, get money & GO SHOPPING!
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
WTF!?
So, I was threatened by this desperado. This guy used to call me the last three nights. Damn, I don't even know him, neither does he know me. And yes, you should know why I called him desperado. What, he thinks I'm free for fuck? No respect at all, you see. How I wished I could dig his eyeballs out and shove a watermelon into his arse. Or maybe chop his dick? So desperate that he'd talk dirty things to any girls. And you know how soft am I. I wasn't able to build up my strengths to talk some sense to him. The next day, few private miscalls were received. I didn't answer any cuz I'm afraid its him. And today, he text me.
*translated*
Him : hey is this reena?
Me : Who are you??
Him : The guy who called you.. Where are you out at? (direct translation)
Me : Please stop contacting me. My bf don't like it.
Him : Why? If you wanna show me attitude like this, I call your mum and dad. Tell them what you did. Serious eh? (I WAS BEING NICE IN THE FIRST PLACE! i guess he don't understand simply english. HAHA)
Me : You wanna tell my mum and dad? Hello, this is my own problem. You don't need to interfere. You and me don't even have any relationships(You have nothing to do with it). So, you don't need to tell my mum and dad. You think you can threaten me??
Him : Nevermind, you wait k.. Hehe
Me : I don't have any time to wait for you. I'm not afraid, anyway.
Me : Anyway, if you wanna threaten people, use some common sense lah. You wanna tell my mum and dad? Come on lah. This is all kids play. Haha! Don't even make any sense.
Him : Nevermind, You wait and see what I'm gonna do. You say your mum and dad don't mind? k lor
Me : What can you do? You don't have any proofs. Like as if you know who my mum and my dad are. Haha. You already disturbed me, and yet you still wanna tell my mum and dad? I can report that you have harassed me.
Him : Haha, macam paham ah. So easy to prove it.
And bla bla bla.. This guy really don't wanna admit defeat. He didn't know that I'm a girl and he's a guy. So easy to report. Cuz he had harassed me first, anyway. True?
PS: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHHAHAHA! Immatured brat huh? Sorry for the vulgarities used..
Monday, October 20, 2008
You are the sun in my day, the wind in my sky,
the waves in my ocean, and the beat in my heart.
3 more days to the 1st monthsarry & Mazree aka Tumatawang birthday! :D
Training is postponed to Friday, 1pm. So, I guess I HAVE to save money for the day just in case Mum or Dad won't give me any. Aww.. -----------------------------------------------
Love is amazingly beautiful. Finally, I get to see the bright side of it. For years, I've been searching for the right one but none of them is compatible with me. All along, its either I have to ask for break up or I was dump. But well, I can't talk so much bout it now. Cuz I can't be sure till when this will last. All I can say is that I'm committed in this relationship. But, being TOO serious, won't do good. Not being serious is not good either. I'm still young after all. Have to have fun too, right? But not till the extend of having affairs with another............. Thats just way out of the line. Anyway, I just feel elated being with him.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Have You Ever Felt Empty Before?
What will you do if the feeling of emptiness engulfs you?I'm lack of friends. But so what? I don't need alot of friends to look "famous". Friends are not accessories anyway. So what if YOU have loads of friends? Does that makes you THINK you're famous? Haha. Okay, I'm not pointing fingers or talking bout anyone :) If you think I'm talking bout you, then what you want me to do? *tounges out*Shit man. Tomorrow's Monday and my classmate says its a must to go to school tomorrow. Cuz my form teacher says so. Sheesh! D: I wanna meet boyfriend! ahh. Screw school. Still considering if I should go.
Boyfriend boyfriend, Take my hand and lets run away together. To where? To the great escape where no one will disturb us and we can rule our own world. Then, we'll have fun like there's no tomorrow. We'll play games, run in the field filled with loads of flowers, soar up high....... & we'll grow old together.. I love you so much!
Well, maybe in my dreams...............
So In Love With You.
 "he looks like as if he's hugging he's older sister or something.." :P
But I can promise Love, For I will love you every minute of the day.
Every minute with him will always be cherished. No matter how abusive he is, I will still love him. Hehe. It's been long since I last felt so happy like this. He's my sunshine in the day, and my moonlight in the night. He's the light that makes my darkness disappear. Damn I sound so mushy? Haha. Jealous much? *tounges out*
Anyway, I'm done with the interview yesterday. & training will be on Tuesday. Looking forward to it. :D But I guess I'll be going alone again. Cuz bf have to go to work.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness.
Surprise visit wasn't surprise at all. Don't wanna mention here.I miss him so..terribly. But I guess I'll be able to see him more often when I get the job at greenridge. *cross fingers*Me & mum are not in the talking mode. ): Okay, honestly, I have no ideas what to blog about. Nothing interesting lately. What do you expect?? Boring life, as usual. D: I need money badly! Like really BADLY! So badly that I'll do anything. WAIT! Just exaggerating. HAHA! Not really anything.. I just wanna earn money with my own sweat. I hate depending on parents. Got tired of it, actually.
How Deep Is Your Love, Sweet Heart?
Its already midnight, and I haven't thought of going to bed. Maybe sooner or later. Waiting for BF's call, actually. But I'm guessing he's tucked in bed already. I feel like missing school again tomorrow. Just lazy. Maybe I'll make a surprise visit to bf's place. Just maybe, if I feel like it. Though I miss him so much..
I'm still thinking bout applying job at greenridge's pizza hut. Will the pay be just enough to pay off my taxi rides to and fro? Haha. But the best thing is that I'm able to get the pay in every two weeks. Hope that both my mum and dad will agree on me working there. *puts innocent mask*
I'm planning on getting a septum piercing soon. Heard that its pain.. Forget the pain, mind the money! Haha! Hope that its inexpensive..
Bf's calling me right now. Someone's eating curry puffs. Hehe. Listening to him munching makes my stomach grumbles. D:
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Love can make you do things that you never thought possible.
Don't you think so?Haven't been going to school this whole week. Laziness is the only reason i can think of. Have been spending time with love ones. It feels like as if holiday have started but not till next week D:7 more days to someone birthday and 1st monthsarry :DPlanning on applying a job at Pizza hut, Matt's work place(Greenridge). Not sure yet. Cuz its a lil too far. But but the best thing is, if I work there, I can meet him more than usual (I always get to meet him on alternats). But you see, the pay is only 3.50 per hour. & that means, I can only get roughly $31.50 per day. (that's if I can survive for 9 hours everyday.)
Monday, October 13, 2008
confessions?
Yes, I do look innocent. Maybe the first time you guys look at me, the first impression would be "Oh, what an innocent girl." But, no. Honestly, I'm not even close. Don't judge a book by its cover. Sometimes, the most innocent looking can turn out to be wild. I feel so shitty now. Sometimes, I just wished I could rewind back to the past & start anew. But I know that will never happen for sure... Unless ofcourse, someone ever so brilliant invent a time machine.. But, who?Life's full of regrets & shits DO happen.. But, no matter how hard we try to avoid, we'll just fail. And the root to the problems is actually ourselves. We made the choice, so just bear the consequences. Sometimes, its silly to be complaining bout it. But we can't refrain from it.. Cuz thats just how life is. Agree ?Sometimes, I wonder why people around us tries to change the way we are. Don't we have choices? But come to think of it, those people who gives advices & nags at us, actually bother & don't wanna see us suffer in the future. Okay, enough bout that. Back to confessions. Yes, I have LOADS of confessions to make. I have LOADS of things to amend, too. But revealing it will make me feel so bare naked. Sometimes, things are just meant to keep within ourselves. Its funny when I'm engulfed in guilt & wished to amend the mistakes but dare not voice out. Maybe I'm just a coward... Coward cuz I'm afraid I'll just lost more people. But ain't I selfish, like that? I should think bout others too, but its just hard. Isn't it?Obstacles obstacles. It always happen at this age. Its like a test actually. & how we handle it, will affect the future. But its never always too late to turn things round. Unless, the clay is hardened and can't be mold anymore. Then, that's another story.
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Lazy arse.
Sorry for not being active lately. Due to exams and ofcourse, pure laziness. Don't blame me! Darn it. Life's been a bore. Nothing much happened lately. Like usual, I lost a few friends. But I'll just move on. I don't mind having no friends, I only want TRUE friends. Not pretenders. If you feel a lil guilt, so be it... Don't tell me, I don't need to know. But, I appreciate those who have been there for me all this time.Lets just update bout my life. Well, nothing much to say actually. Just that I got myself in a deep problem. Well well. I guess this is life. We're prone to get ourself into problems no matter how hard we try to avoid it. Hmm, let me think of something interesting I did lately.................... errr, well.. I can't even think of anything. OMG! Have I been wasting time all this while? DARN! Haha. Okay, I did nothing interesting actually. Just hang around with my friends and did some catch up. HARI RAYA HARI RAYA! I've spent ALL my money. Like, WOAH! Haha. But, didn't waste ALL of it..... Its a surprise thing I bought for someone :D Not gonna say it here, just in case if he reads it. (Its a miracle if he will)So moving on, today, went out with Mazree. Had a really, REALLY great time. Like really really! :D I intended to find a job, actually.. But everything's above 16 except for.... fastfoods like macdonals, kfc & LJ. darn! So, we walked around and end up going to Shafiq's place. Played some games. Haha! Quite fun, actually. "Weezy Wuzzy likes kiss but not hug."Well I'm running out of ideas to blog. PS : If it wasn't for SOMEONE who asks "eh, why you never update your blog anymore?", this post wouldn't be here. Haha!
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Sorry Mum;
Sorry if I'm not her. Sorry if I fail to be the girl you want your daughter to be. Sorry if I'm not perfect. But this is me. Yes, I'm not that good in studies, like her. But I've tried. Do you even know? I guess not. Cuz you don't bother, don't you? You never asked bout my studies. You don't even encourage me. What you do is only compare, compare & compare. I got tired of that. & so, I just let it out at you. But that's just the half of it. I controlled. Because I know its a sin. I hate you yet I love you. Thats cuz you're my only Mother. You've take care of me since baby.. After you gave birth for me. You grew me up for 15 years. More than that, ofcourse. But, I failed to be what you want me to be..... & I hate the way you compare me with other people... Its like you're trynna say that you can't accept the way I am. I love you still, anyway.
Friday, October 03, 2008
Untitled;
Sorry for being unactive lately. Been busy! But anyway,
 will update a proper one soon! :D have fun!
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