just got to know that the late Danial Syawal, frm my school, who drowned at clmenti swimming complex was actually a cousin of my friend.. well, hope that he'll rest in peace :)
Didn't get to meet him, today. i miss him D: cross country is just in 2 days time. And we were told that it was not a competitive one this year. it means that, we don't need to run ! :D ahhhh... i love 2008 !
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Today is okay, i assume.
That's only because i get to meet him ! :D
oh well... i'm starting to feel insecure, again.. I don't know.. Should i ask him what he have been doing lately ? or should i just keep it to myself ? ohh. i don't know..
i just gotta trust him. i have to. yeah. that's it. :)
i really hope that he won't take advantage of my kindness, just like my previous exboyfriends...
I love him till the end of time. and i love him the way he is :D nothing will change that, for now. Because my love for him is true.
Monday, January 28, 2008
didn't get to meet him today ): i miss him so much... so much..
went to far East with mummy yesterday. She bought me 2 pair of jeans and a pair of everlast shoe.. Awww. :D
well, i guess 2008 is not bad at all. New things are coming.. I've found the perfect guy to be with. Gosh, we have a lot of things in common. And that's good. I could understand & trust him, now. Oh god, I hope that he won't be like my previous exboyfriend..
So far, I've always been happy ever since i became his. He really changed my life.. He made me look forward to the next day, everyday. :D I hope his/my feeling won't change.
I'm falling deeper in love with him.. Lets just hope that things will stay the same, for now. :)
Sunday, January 27, 2008
we were supposed to go out yesterday. but everything turned out horrendous. mum didn't let me. damn it. i was so pissed.
well, but in the end.. she wanted to meet him.. :] this will be the first time she finally approve me. and i hope that everything will turn out fine next week.
I want my mum to meet him, anyway.
i'm so looking forward to it. :D
Cross country on 1st feb.. I'm sooo lazy to run.. D: I'm not going to run, anyway. HAHA.
Going to far east later with mum. :D i so love her !
Friday, January 25, 2008
5 days together and it felt like 2 years, already.he's the best damn thing that have ever happened in my life.i love him. i really do.it have been so long since i felt this way.it really felt good. :Di really hope that this will last. i don't want to spend another living, searching for another like you.i wanna grow old with you.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
messed up everything, yesterday. well, not everything... Wouldn't want to blog bout it. Didn't meet bf just now because mum wants me to follow her to plaza sing. Oh well... But at least i get to buy a bag. :D
oh, and i recieved a testimonial comment from bf's exgirlfriend.. I feel so bad.. urgh.. i don't know. ): i'm feeling so insecure, now.. But i just have to trust him because love needs trust, anyway.. Lets just hope that he'll leave his past behind and start a new future with me, now. i just want to last with him.. I love him so much.. )':
I'm not going online on msn as much as last time anymore.. I even deleted most of the guys contact in my phone.. alot, actually. because i don't see a need to keep them anymore. :)
i love taufiq. and that's it.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
i never find a love like this.
2001'08, 1:57pm. let's make this last.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Always said I would know where to find love, Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough, But some times I just felt I could give up. But you came and you changed my whole world now, I'm somewhere I've never been before. Now I see, what love means.
It's so unbelievable, And I don't want to let it go, Something so beautiful, Flowing down like a waterfall. I feel like you've always been, Forever a part of me. And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love, Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.
In my heart, in my head, it's so clear now, Hold my hand you've got nothing to fear now, I was lost and you've rescued me some how-. I'm alive, I'm in love you complete me, And I've never been here before.
this feeling is just so deep. and whenever i'm beside him, i feel so safe and secure. It's just different.. indescribable, indeed.
he say i'm like a star. but all he don't know is that he's my angel. :)
Thursday, January 17, 2008
i'm feeling so lucky ! :) and i swear i never felt so happy till i cried.. if only, only..
valentines is in a month time ! :D i'm so looking forward to it.. and i knew just who to go out with..
every minutes with him will be treasured, deeply. how i wish i could be by his side every day..
Then as time kept going, I noticed some things That our love kept growing, wanted to run away 'Cause the situations in the past, none of them really last Memories just had a hold of me.
But I, had to let go of the pain
'Cause you helped me open up my eyes, showed me things I could never see
Wanna see you when I wake up I'll stay with you only Cause I need you to show me how our love should really be
I used to wonder where we're going, and where I wanted to be Sittin' alone, all shook up when I found my destiny Hearing songs on the radio, wishin' that could happen for me, oh ohh (ohh oh) Then when you came in the picture, then I knew quickly That we could build something so strong Expect the best for the future, forget about what used to be I need you here all life long.
Monday, January 14, 2008
ignore the previous post. i was out of my mind. *sigh*
he msged me, again... half of me says that maybe he needs someone to talk to.. another part of me says that he just wanna suck up..
AHHH !! @^&*(&*@&*^)#. i'm so uaehdcouaehbc stressed up that my hair is falling....... WTF ! and i think i'm fat. just $%E&^* don't say i'm not... because i know i am.. i have fats bulging at my hips now. EEW.
ergh. why am i facing such problems, now ?? i need someone who could understand me... if only.. if only..
uh, today suck. i got a blister on the back of my foot. and it bled. mum helped me to put plaster. gaaah, i need help. ):
Sunday, January 13, 2008
woke up early today. I'm bored. D: i wanna go down and hang around with my friends.. *sigh*
"i feel like i've lost everything when you're gone" and seeing you with another girl, makes me think bout the past again. i hate you for making me love you and leaving me when you found someone new. don't suck up because i'll hate you, forever.LIAR ! jackass. BITCH ! asshole. those drugs will only make you thinner and slow, idiot. it ain't cool,dumbass. use your brains and think, birdbrained.
" i don't wanna be alone.. But now i feel like i don't know you "
Saturday, January 12, 2008
i'm happy now, that he's back to singapore. :D but i'm kinda sad too cuz of something.. i just don't know why. ): I've been keeping alot of things.. And whenever i feel like telling someone, i'll end up changing my mind.. Because i trust no one, now..
I wonder, why all guys always go for looks.. *sigh*
i want a guy who will always be there for me.. ): looking at couples, REALLY, reaaaally makes me feel so empty and useless. ):
i cried day and night thinking why am i always alone.. i feel so... rejected ..
I'm stupid. deal with it.
I'm never gonna find the one. never.
Friday, January 11, 2008
FRIDAY !! yay. the day i always looked forward in every schooling week. :DD if only i could go out tomorrow.. D:
i have a new friend, btw :] FURIIN !!!
\m/ haha. and i swear he could sing very well ! :D VERY.
well then... today's lessons are BORING, as usual.. wtf. I HATE BENJAMIN TAN !! damnit. why oh why must i have him as a form teacher and english teacher ???? that fuckeen ugly monster... i'm gonna flung my english for sure.... _|_ SWAY! KILL THAT MONSTER PLEASE !!!!
Thursday, January 10, 2008
i missed school today. Was late. damnit. I hate detention class. So, i told my dad i'm not going to school and go home instead. This sucks.
I miss him so much ! ): he's at Pulau Ubin now.. Camping.
It's raining, it's pouring ! I caught flu. And it's kinda cold, now. I'm wrapped up in my blanket.
I'm feeling so tired, today.. I don't know why.. *sigh*
2008 is BORING, for sure. i miss the sec 4 nt last year. Without them, school is so quiet.. ): I miss 2007 !! damnit.
someone, anyone ? Please invent a time machine for me......
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
life is monotonous. everything is falling apart... i'm feel like a burden to him, now. oh, i don't know. waiting for him, is like waiting for rain in the drought.. i just don't have any confidence now.. i searched for true love.. but never have i found it.. and when there's someone who really love me, i'll tend to leave them and go for someone else... and get hurt in the end.. for this, i hope that he'll be the last guy i fall in love with.. i don't want to keep on changing boyfriends.. i wanna be close with him.. and his happiness is my 1st priority, for now. I don't care whatever our relationship is.. as long as we're close, that'll be enough for me.. well, it doesn't mean if we're both in love, we HAVE to be together, right ? :)
oh well.. sec 3 life is getting tougher.. I don't know if i could cope with my studies.. but bio is fun ! :)
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
countdown was GREAT, i supposed. But it will be GREATER if he(m) came.... and everything was screwed up after countdown... *sigh*
Okay. I used my bro's name to go out... I went out first. Took a bus to clementi. Meet Fazly to get the ticket. Sat with him for awhile to have a chat. It's been a long time, anyway.. He gave me 5 tickets for countdown at vivo.. But M didn't came.. D: My friend called and asked to meet up at esplanade.. I wasn't in a mood.. So, i tried to ask my best cousin, Kak Dhit, if she could go countdown with me. I asked her to bring her future boyfriend too & his friend, Danny. But eventually, Danny couldn't turn up because he's going clubbing. Ha ha. yes, ALONE again... so, i asked Aman if he could come because i got extra pair of tickets. And he say he will be there.
So, off i go. To Vivo.. Waited for my cousin.. Then, my bestfriend called. She says that she's at vivo, too. Um, i was alone... so, i met her.. AHH !!! i missed her soo much. it's been almost 2 months since we last met.. like, omg. She accompanied me with her friend. So, yeah. Finally, my cousin came.. with her future boyfriend..
So, we sat at the rooftop.. Waiting for Aman. We went in after he came. But we didn't get to sit at the amph because it was fullhouse. D: So, stood near the stage instead.. I was short.. So, i couldn't see everything... ): it would be easier if we went in earlier... *sigh......
Then, after countdown, Aman went to catch a movie with his cousin.. So, me, Kak Dhit and her future boyfriend went to eat at the coffee shop opp habourfront.. I was alone, indeed. My cousin was sticking with her boyfriend... GAAAH !!! ): i'm kinda pissed off and jealous..
If only M came... ): sigh.
well, i don't wanna continue the story any further. All i could say was that it end up horrendously. Me and my bro were scolded by my cousin's dad ( our uncle ). gaaaahhh !!!!!
