Today i'm seriously not in the mood. I don't know why. Maybe what my classmate say is true ? My moods were like the weather after all. hais. Sometimes, im happy. Then suddenly, sad.. And turned to anger. oh gosh. why why ?? Im confused. fuck it.

I told myself i want to change but it ends up worst ! i don't know..... When i see Gf with her bf, i begin to feel jeloused. not because of them being together. But i just wished me&him were like them.

The city walk was okay. At first, i waited for mira & the rest at the Glorious Dead. Waited&waited. Finally, they arrived. Then we walked together. It was both boring and fun. Tiring too !! Half way through, met Syah&haziq&haikal. That time, Adham & the rest were at the coffee shop. so, me n gf walked with them. Then, met Raiyan&Ilham. They were eating !! omg.

So, we walked again. But we left Syah&the rest bcause they are going with Zasli and his friends. So, me,Mira,WeiKian,Ilham & Raiyan walked together. At last, we reached. 5km okay !!

After that, we went to the esplanade. Mira changed her clothes. Then, we walked . I was quite pissed off because they were walking trough n fro at the esplanade . As you know, my legs can't take it any longer.

Then, Mirul went off. So, its only left me&gf&had&ad. Walked and walked. i was fucking hungry lah !!! and feeling giddy. I actually wanted to faint but i forced myself not to. Me with my fucking attitude, walked straight to the toilet without turning back. after i went in the cubicle, i actually vomitted alot . After the disgusting moment, i decided not to meet them first. i want to rest for a while and cool down. Mira msged me and told me that adham fell down when he searched for me. Hadz made me fucking hell lot pissed off by msging me and telling me that i have make them wait like stupid ppl and made them have a hard time. sorry gf. hais. im just not in the fucking mood. oh god...

My face was very pale. And my legs were very wobbly & unstable. My eyes were blurry. My head is dizzy. My hp batt is flat. Today was very sway indeed. fuck it. I actually wanted to watch the fireworks tonight with gf&syah&hisfriends. ahh ! Got flu now because of walking under the rain. Now, i got fever ! 38degreeC man !! argh !!

Msged adham... I told him that im not suited for him. And i suck at love. and told him bout my mood swings and all. and i even told him that i hoped he found a new girl. what the fuck i am doing !!! this is soo not what i wanted. I really love him even without him seducing me. Im okay with it. but i did it again !! i don't know.. *sobs.

I just wish things wouldn't turn out to be this way. i made ppl angry with me. I dont want to break up with him. Please forgive me.

To mira :
i'm sorry for the attitude just now. I didn't mean it. It's just that im not in the mood. I'm sick. Hope that you would forgive me. I told you that i would change but i became worst. I'm a big spoiler.

a video for you-know-who